exclusive – Boots up (eventually) on the Amico.

contract expired – When someone runs screaming for the hills when they see the current state of development.

input lag – Something you pretend doesn’t exist.

wireless charging – Charging that requires metal contacts (i.e wires) to work.

webmaster – Some unpaid intern you reassign to work on the firmware and UI rather than maintain your website because you can’t hire experienced people and you’re in the weeds.

partner – Someone you pay money to for anything and they don’t know or care who you are e.g. “When I bought a Butterfinger Blizzard, Dairy Queen became my Dessert Partner”.

“hottest licenses” – abandoned or nearly free properties and personalities from the 70s that no child alive has heard of or cares about.

CEO – Someone who can talk for hours on a webcam from his attic without saying anything of relevance to the questions asked while his hands flail around independently to distract from facial ticks betraying deception.

CFO – Someone who can talk for hours on a webcam from his office without saying anything of relevance to the questions asked while keeping still and speaking in a monotone voice which makes him seem more reasonable and almost professional when juxtaposed to the CEO.

focus group – When the CEO brings together his family and his employees’ families under the pretense of a pizza party to tell the CEO what he wants to hear.

hater – Anyone who quotes the CEO fully and in context.

personal attack – When someone presents a quote of the CEO completely contradicting a more recent statement made by the CEO.

gaming racist – Anyone who won’t pre-order an Amico.

fun – Whatever a CEO tells you is fun!  He has focus groups that prove what fun is, so he knows better than you what you think is fun, Hater!

couch co-op – One person watches another person play a platform game for hour and might get to pick up his controller for a tacked-on shooter for a minute.

“closer to launch” – next year

Mom 2.0 – A mother that a group of old white dudes (many single and without children) can tell what to buy because they know what’s best for her and math is hard.

physical media – Something requiring an internet connection to function that will be worthless once the company’s servers are shut down.

“in the process of” –  It’s on the Honey-Do-List for next week.

planning – Thought about it in the shower one morning.

securing – Opened a web browser and thought about typing something in the search bar.

20202020, 2021, 2022

FCC certification – What’s that?

tall – Anyone with a height greater than 5’2".

99.9% complete – Time to raise more capital via crowdfunding!

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